it hurts like crazy. it hurts frm the the centre of my chest and spreads to my arms and hands. ever experience this? feels like my heart is straining to pump blood to the rest of my body.

feels like my heart is straining to pump love to u.

i think u need time and space. i think i need recovery time. but everytime i see ur name in my phone, the thought of how i'm going to cope with time and space, tml's hug, my 'heart attack' come all over again. i'm sorry, but i insist. we need to sort things out. i donno wat we're doing, where we're heading, wat do u wan. i do love u alot. but i cant let this go on.

i always thought being concern about ur well-being, trying to care as much as i can, is the right way of loving u. apparently, i was proved wrong. time and again, i was proved wrong. now i finally get it. prolly my way of love is not for u. maybe u dun need this form of love from me. cuz, "u know urself". this is not the form of love u wan. but i cant help it. it's MY way of loving.

i'm sorry. it hurts and tears me apart. to know that my form of love is being seen as irritating, and earned a cold war, a black face.

i donno wat to do anymore.

and u said i take u for granted. i still cant figure out how. tell me.